Once we hit middle school, things start to change.
No more chill life for us!
Middle school in Japan is called:
It's not just about studying harder, we also get thrown into this whole hierarchy thing.
You know what happens to our older friends we used to hang out with?
They are there and we go to the same school now but they are not the same anymore.
They act like they're better than us and deserve our respect.
They became Senpai.
Someone who is older than you at school or in an organization or someone who has been in an organization longer than you.
Basically, we call anyone who is in the higher grade in school Senpai.
When I was on a school soccer team, my Senpai were really nice to us and we all got along very well so they let us talk to them in Tameguchi.
But not all Senpai are like that.
Some of them take the hierarchy thing pretty seriously and expect us to use Keigo when talking to them.
If you don't use it, there could be consequences.
If you're lucky, your Senpai might just get annoyed or offended but not do anything.
But if you're unlucky, you could get beaten up.
There are rebellious kids who don't like certain Senpai and talk to them in Tameguchi to show that they don't respect them.
Sometimes it can lead to a fight and the Senpai loses, which is really embarrassing for them.
But if you think about it, there's no guarantee that Senpai are stronger or better than us, right?
What separates us from Senpai?
In Japan, the school year starts on April 1st and ends on March 31st, which means if your Senpai was born on March 31st and you were born on April 1st, they're only one day older than you.
But even with no real advantage, they think they're better just because of the senpai-kohai system.
Someone who is younger than you at school or in an organization, or someone who joined the organization after you.
Honestly, I think this system is stupid and it makes it harder to be friends with people in different grades.
I had this one childhood friend who was 4 years older than me and we had lost touch for a while.
Then, when I was 15 and working as a cashier at a convenience store, he came in and asked for a pack of cigarettes.
It was good to see him again, and I talked to him as if we were still hanging out like we used to.
He seemed a bit cold, but we still exchanged some words before he left.
A few days later, I ran into his younger brother and he said:
I was SHOCKED 😱 😱 😱
I mean, we used to hang out and we used to be cool but just because I didn’t use Keigo, he wanted to beat me up.
Isn't it ridiculous?
Thankfully, nothing happened and I haven't seen him since.
This kind of thing is the reason why I hate this system so much.
People can get angry over nothing if you don't use the right language.
It does't matter if you are friendly or not.
By the way, I usually tell my close Kōhai to talk to me in Tameguchi because there's actually an advantage to it.
I'll get into that in more detail soon.
But before that, let me share some ridiculous things I’ve seen or heard related to the senpai-kohai hierarchy.
I remember a Kōhai who got roughed up by his Senpai simply for laughing too loudly.
And can you believe a Senpai once got mad because a Kōhai hadn’t fastened the top button of his uniform? Yeah, leaving your uniform unbuttoned was seen as a rebellious act at school...
Another time, a Kōhai caught heat for not tucking in his shirt properly. Looking back, it’s kind of ridiculous to fuss over uniform styles that much.
Oh, and there was this Kōhai who got into trouble just for making eye contact with his Senpai while passing by. It's a big deal and not just in schools; even on the street, accidental eye contact can lead to a confrontation. It’s a silly reason to start a fight, but it happens.
Greeting your Senpai was serious business too. Skip a "hello" and you could really tick them off. It's all about respect – or at least, that's what they'd think.
In those days, you really had to keep a low profile to avoid unnecessary attention from your Senpai.
Things might be different now, and I'm sure it varies from school to school, but that’s how it was back when I was a student.
By the way, the kids I used to play indoor soccer/football with have hit middle school now.
But they still come play with us sometimes. And guess what? They've started using Keigo with me.
It feels odd that they shifted how they talk to me just like that with the middle school transition, but hey, that's the Japanese way!